[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.4.2″ background_color=”#a397a7″ custom_padding=”7px|||||”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.4.2″ width=”100%” saved_tabs=”all” collapsed=”off”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.4.2″][et_pb_image src=”http:\/\/jilnajasani.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/jillna-flower-topper-01.png” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ max_width=”350px” module_alignment=”center”][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_post_title meta=”off” featured_image=”off” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ title_font=”Kurale|||on|||||” title_text_align=”center” title_font_size=”40px”][\/et_pb_post_title][et_pb_image src=”http:\/\/jilnajasani.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/5-Core-Life-Lessons-and-Values-I-Desire-for-Myself-and-Jian.jpg” _builder_version=”4.4.2″][\/et_pb_image][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.4.2″ width=”100%”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.4.2″][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.4.2″ text_font_size=”19px” header_font_size=”45px” header_2_font=”|||on|||||” header_2_font_size=”32px” hover_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n
When I hit my rock bottom I felt it.\u00a0 I knew it.\u00a0 Today I’m sharing a part of that story.\u00a0 But, before I do, I want to remind you that healing is a journey.<\/span><\/p>\n The last time we met, we talked about the truth behind our triggers.<\/span><\/p>\n A lot of things may come up as you explore a new way of seeing triggers: feelings, thought patterns, and bodily sensations.There will be times where you feel at ease and invigorated by the truth that arises, and there will be times where you feel challenged.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_image src=”http:\/\/jilnajasani.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/pexels-pixabay-158465-scaled.jpg” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ hover_enabled=”0″][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.4.2″ text_font_size=”19px” hover_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n It\u2019s okay to feel these emotions. Be gentle with yourself. This is new information, and anything new can feel challenging to overcome.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n You are learning to understand who you are by listening to what your inner child needs. You are learning to re-parent a part of you that was created unknowingly. You are learning to reconnect with yourself by feeling into your body where the emotions feel trapped, while simultaneously learning how to stay present without being hijacked by the past.<\/span><\/p>\n This is the route to healing. It\u2019s a sacred journey, where you must have compassion for yourself.<\/span><\/p>\n Albert Einstein said that pain cannot be resolved at the same level of thought that created it. What happened in the past can\u2019t be undone. However, how we choose to perceive the future is in our control. How we claim our true self back is within our power.<\/span><\/p>\n The healing journey reveals that underneath all the beliefs and ways of thinking, there is a whole\u00a0 person who is free and curious about the world around them. When we understand this, we understand that we have nothing to control, fix, or manage. Therefore, we are also able to understand that our children are whole, curious, self-expressed, and complete.<\/span><\/p>\n Curiosity has the power to transform us to our core if we allow the triggers to lead us. These triggers are asking us to be curious. We intuitively know something feels off; the trigger is a consistent reminder from the subconscious mind because it wants us to revive our true self.<\/span><\/p>\n Allow me to share a personal story.<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_image src=”http:\/\/jilnajasani.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/pexels-wendy-van-zyl-1112048-scaled.jpg” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ hover_enabled=”0″][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.4.2″ text_font_size=”19px” hover_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n We enrolled Jian in preschool at 18 months. I had a choice to keep him home with me, but I was already knee-deep in culture\u2019s conditioning around \u201csocializing children with their peers from a young age.\u201d So off I went and enrolled him in a Montessori program, thinking that this self-led program would help (1) nurture his needs for love and understanding and (2) soothe my anxiety around socializing him.<\/span><\/p>\n He resisted with all his might from Day 1, hysterically crying and flailing his arms and legs, hoping we would see that he wasn\u2019t ready, while the teachers of the school tried to console my nerves (but in hindsight completely hijacked my inner child), with how \u201cnormal\u201d his behavior was and that with practice he would adjust.<\/span><\/p>\n \u00a0<\/span>I was left with mixed thoughts of:<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m scared.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cHe needs to socialize.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cAm I doing the right thing?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cWhat if he ends up hating me for this?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m hurting him.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m hurting.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n As time went on, he began to manifest social and separation anxiety. Furthermore, I began to notice my forceful behavior of sending him to school every day, resulting in his resentment towards me. He began to favor Jigar over me.<\/span><\/p>\n Jigar became his first choice, no matter what! He screamed and wailed when I fed him. He hit and bit me constantly. The emotional pain I experienced became unbearable.<\/span><\/p>\n A child who has been forced into doing or saying something that feels unnatural to them, by an adult who is fearful of their own ego self, will experience a loss of their true self.<\/b><\/p>\n This loss creates egoic thought patterns in children such as:<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m in danger.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cI can\u2019t trust this person.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cThey won\u2019t believe me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cIs something wrong with me?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cMaybe it\u2019s my fault.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n \u201cThey don\u2019t like me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n When these thoughts are left unprocessed, an emotion is created. On a physical level, the emotions come and go, but they create triggers in our body that create discomfort or become physically painful.<\/span><\/p>\n My asthma flared, while Jian started to experience stomach aches.<\/span><\/p>\n I started to eat more, while Jian started to eat less.<\/span><\/p>\n I had intense outbursts of anger, while Jian began to bite his nails.<\/span><\/p>\n I became addicted to working, while Jian began to resist rest and sleep.<\/span><\/p>\n In the turbulence of experiencing my triggers and witnessing Jian\u2019s, I hit rock bottom and began to seek deeper answers.<\/span><\/p>\n I learned how to sit with my feelings and watch my thoughts. I learned how to practice not attaching to the way I was taught to think about things and to explore how my inner child may have perceived situations.<\/span><\/p>\n I began to ask myself all sorts of questions, like:<\/span><\/p>\n Why is this parenting experience so hard?<\/span><\/p>\n Why is it so hard for me to express myself?<\/span><\/p>\n Why doesn\u2019t Jian see my purest intentions?<\/span><\/p>\n Why am I so angry?<\/span><\/p>\n Why is Jian so sensitive?<\/span><\/p>\n Why do I feel the need to force him to socialize at 18 months?<\/span><\/p>\n Who would he be if he didn\u2019t socialize?<\/span><\/p>\n This curiosity led me to enter into a journey back to myself. It revealed to me how judgmental my ego mind was. How trapped and confined my thoughts were. Most things in my life seemed to have predefined, absolute truths, such as:<\/span><\/p>\n I turned out fine. I\u2019ll follow what my mom says. She knows.<\/span><\/p>\n People don\u2019t understand me.<\/span><\/p>\n Jian is too young to understand what he needs.<\/span><\/p>\n I\u2019m angry because no one listens or cares.<\/span><\/p>\n Jian is so sensitive. I can teach him how to be strong.<\/span><\/p>\n I\u2019m not forcing him. I\u2019m doing what\u2019s best for him.<\/span><\/p>\n If he doesn\u2019t socialize, he will become lonely.<\/span><\/p>\n And when I thought about these ideas a little more deeply, I realized I didn\u2019t even agree with them. They didn\u2019t feel like the truth at all. They didn\u2019t represent who I really am.<\/span><\/p>\n Like me, you intuitively know something in your life feels off.\u00a0 You\u2019re acting in a way that doesn\u2019t exactly align with how you want to act.\u00a0 This creates anxiety in you.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n So you wonder where the disconnect is. Who\u2019s right? Your intuition and how you <\/span>want<\/b> to act,\u00a0 or how you think you <\/span>should<\/b> act?<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_image src=”http:\/\/jilnajasani.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/10\/pexels-juan-pablo-serrano-arenas-1101726-scaled.jpg” _builder_version=”4.4.2″ hover_enabled=”0″][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.4.2″ text_font_size=”19px” hover_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n Understanding the gap between your intuition and your thoughts will help you bridge that gap.\u00a0 In bridging the gap, you\u2019ll learn what your truth is, and you\u2019ll learn who you are. And you\u2019ll dissolve the anxiety, leaving you acting in ways that align you to your truth.<\/span><\/p>\n Give it a try.\u00a0 Use the prompts below to help you deconstruct your own values:<\/span><\/p>\n A recurring thought that gives me anxiety is \u2026?<\/span><\/p>\n Is my thought true?<\/span><\/p>\n Is it 100% true?<\/span><\/p>\n How do I react when I believe that thought?<\/span><\/p>\n Who would I be without that thought?<\/span><\/p>\n Turn the thought around. Does it resonate? Can I find examples of where this thought is not true?<\/span><\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" When I hit my rock bottom I felt it.\u00a0 I knew it.\u00a0 Today I’m sharing a part of that story.\u00a0 But, before I do, I want to remind you that healing is a journey. The last time we met, we talked about the truth behind our triggers. A lot of things may come up as […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3095,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"nf_dc_page":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"_joinchat":[],"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[22,23,21,25,28,29,34,35,45,37,42,46],"class_list":["post-3098","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized","tag-authentic","tag-authenticity","tag-awareness","tag-commitment","tag-connect","tag-connection","tag-conscious-choice","tag-consciousness","tag-healing","tag-process","tag-time","tag-work"],"yoast_head":"\n