Like me, you thought you mastered the formula for a
“Successful and Self-Expressed Life.”
But you’ve realized you can’t get through a day without feeling unhappy:
angry, guilty, overwhelmed, resentful, or even completely confused.
You’re left wondering why, if you’ve mastered what it takes, are you unable to effectively communicate with or understand your children?
You might feel like every part of your definition
of a “Successful Life” is short lived:
The arguments you compromise in, no matter your feelings, for the sake of
modeling the importance of sustaining long relationships.
The A-rated private school you’ve enrolled your children in from an early age.
The rich life you provide, indulging them with fancy vacations,
new toys, and games.
So you begin to read books and Google things like “how to get my child to listen to me.”
You learn:
…to speak calmly(and you do, until you don’t).
…to offer choices(but what if your child picks neither?).
…to ask for their opinion(but what you don’t always agree with them?).
…to explain what you need (but you’ve confused them with your
lengthy explanations).
Sometimes it works. But mostly it doesn’t.
It’s different every day, and you can barely keep up.
There is a gap between your communication and their inability to express their needs.
As human beings and underneath words, we speak in a language of emotions.
This gap between your communication and your children’s inability to express their needs is the disconnection
you are experiencing, leaving you feeling angry, guilty, overwhelmed, resentful, and most of all longing for clarity.
In order for you to understand their needs, you need to understand their emotions.
To do that, you must first make the journey to understand your own.
By understanding your own emotions, you will understand your needs underneath your emotions,
and therefore understand your children’s emotions and needs.
In bridging this gap, you will be able to authentically connect to your child,
and can begin to recreate your world into the reality you are trying to make for yourself.
This is the opening for Clear Communication.
Here, we focus on you. Not your child or your intimate relationships.
As a coach, my primary mission is to help you learn the tools to bridge this gap.
This is not about strategies or techniques. Nor is it about fixing you or your child.
It is about helping you embark on a journey of deep understanding of yourself,
to understand the needs underneath your emotions.
Because once you realize your own needs, you will realize your child’s needs;
and enter into a state of better understanding and of being understood.
You will create new ways to communicate and connect with each other by:
Asking concise questions.
Listening to each other without being judgemental or presumptuous.
Honoring each other’s choices while taking responsibility
and holding each other accountable.
Co-creating an environment that helps each of you meet your own needs.
thriving in the truth:
turning triggers into
your triggers connect with yourself more deeply
and communicate with clarity to create the growth
and concretion you desire in your relationships
We’ve been raised in a culture that understands Success and Self-Expression as a condition.
A spider’s innate behavior is to make webs. A dolphin’s innate behavior is to swim.
Similarly, a human being’s innate behavior is to express themselves;
therefore they need the freedom to do so.
You can verify that you innately have this quality of self-expression
by looking at the way children think and act.
they already had them. They are examples of a child’s imagination at play,
without knowing boundaries or knowing specific ways of being or doing things.
So how is it that the way you express yourself is so vastly different than your children’s?
How have you defined your creativity in such absolute and concrete ways?
Why have you set limitations where, for example, forts are only built out of wood and large rocks;
yet your children freely think outside the box?
Were you this self-expressed and free when you were a child, too?
In working with me, you’ll discover the tools to make sense of these questions,
which will help you transform how you communicate; allowing you to better understand
and be understood in the relationships that are so important to you.
client love
amita
I love getting your follow-up emails after our session and just those I think are worth the cost of the whole session. When it comes to investing in ourselves we often struggle with how we can set money aside for it but each time I have done that, I’ve recovered the fees many times over and also moved closer to my personal growth goal. I am lucky to have you as a friend and a coach!”
I’M A CERTIFIED CONSCIOUS PARENTING COACH
FROM DR. SHEFALI’S COACHING INSTITUTE.
